Comfort

Did you miss me? I’ve not been gone for any real reason… just haven’t had much to say. In any case, I’m back, sunburned after a weekend at the beach, and overheating as I welcome the hot season to Cambodia. This means power outages, more dustiness and (you guessed it!) heat. So as I sit here and boil, I’ve been thinking about comfort.

I do not have a television. This is odd, since I used to study television content, and I was a big fan of my TiVo. At USC, we asked students in our class how many television sets they had in their childhood homes. Answers ranged from 1 to 12 (TV in the bathrooms…I know), with quite a bit of variation, and one girl whose father was a TV mogul (and had over 20 TVs). Nevertheless, all 200 would admit to having grown up in a home with a television. It is strange that now I would have to admit not owning such a “basic” appliance.

In the rural areas in Cambodia, not having electricity does not halt the spread of television. Families use a car battery to provide the voltage necessary to catch their favorite programs. One of the top 10 Cambodian shows is… professional wrestling. In villages far from the beaten path, kids wear t-shirts featuring Dave Batista and other WWE stars. I came home for lunch last week, and watched someone get body slammed as I parked my motorbike. It makes me wonder about the diffusion of culture and why some of America’s best things are missing here (democracy, justice) and instead some of our worst exports appear.

I’ve sacrificed television for many reasons. One is that I don’t think I’d watch it very much, since I’ve taken to going to bed early. Another reason is that I would have to pay for cable, since all of the non-cable programs are in Khmer. While it might sharpen my language skills, I’ve also discovered that Cambodian dramatic programming is… well, let’s just say I’m not a fan of reality television or soap operas. My choices here would be limited. Lastly, I found that even when I was staying in a home that had a TV, I mainly wanted to watch movies… when I wanted to watch at all. I can see the latest US films using my laptop DVD player (for the outrageous cost of $2 per DVD and the guilt associated with piracy). I’ve watched exactly 4 episodes of American Idol this season when I’ve eaten dinner with friends, and as I’m not a big fan, I don’t think I’m missing much. TV is simply an expense that I both cannot justify at this point, and which seems a little extravagant.

I realize that I do not live like most Cambodians. For starters, I live by myself, and my family is thousands of miles away. When my friends ask where I stay, and who I stay with, they are usually shocked that I “sleep alone.” (Note: I have come to realize the terms sleeping/living/staying are pretty interchangeable. It makes that last sentence a little less provocative, eh?) Second, I have a refrigerator, a microwave, and a washing machine. My apartment is positively luxurious. Finally, I own my own computer, and I have it in my home. For people living in the developing world, computers are not so ubiquitous. When my friends want to check their email, they go to work or to an internet café. Or, they simply don’t have email (here’s a game: name one person you know who doesn’t have an email address. I have 3).

When I started writing about not having a television, I was thinking about items that usually get quantified as “needed.” Yet, they’re really about comfort, not need. If I had to list the things I missed most about the US, my television would fall somewhere around the bottom of the list. Have I matured to the point where I can flaunt my lack of entertainment options? No, I don’t think so. I think everyone can live without television, especially when other options are available. I guess what I’m learning most is about what makes me comfortable. Sure, it’s things like TVs and iPods. Those are certainly nice, and they help pass the time. Yet the places where I’m uncomfortable in Cambodia are somehow more poignant. When I sit in our office Bible study and can’t understand what people are talking about. When I’m pretty sure there’s been a joke made about me in Khmer. When I accidentally do or say something just a little inappropriate, because I don’t have all the cultural do’s and don’ts figured out. When I can’t ask someone about how they are really doing because I don’t know enough Khmer to get past the basics. So these are the things that I’m driven to fix. These are urgent on my list of priorities: learning the language, understanding the culture, and deepening my relationships with Cambodians. They have nothing to do with possessions, and everything to do with people. When I think about it that way, living without a TV seems pretty easy.